The Shorter the Skirt, the Higher the Kick

Guttural writing and interactive mind games from 'the sweetest girl on the Internet'. No minors or morally outraged, please! ;-)

Diary: This Day

Sweden has been hot the last week, far too hot for a country with floor heating and hot water-warmed towel hangers but no AC. All I want to do right now is to sit and lubricate my inside and outside while I hum Juifs errants de Norwège, dites-moi la neige, anciens exilés chers, dites-moi la mer to a catchy little tune until we take the boat out to the Stockholm archipelago, but since I didn't write the words (Arthur did, who stopped writing at my age when I am just about starting) and you can't hear the melody it probably doesn't count as a post, so I'll just hammer down some little ditty of my own, short enough for a scorching day and maybe suitable for beach contemplation, until it's time to go:

This day we share today is of a most peculiar kind:

Eternity in front of it, eternity behind.

Peace out!

Read on:

22 bounce-backs:

Blogger gregoire says...,

I have a poem too:

This day we share today is going to kick butt.

One hunk in front of you and me behind.


Blogger Fej says...,

You know, while I'm old and all, well nevermind, we've established your age already.

AC is a rare thing in Northern Europe.

Anonymous Anonymous says...,

I wanna be your hunk for a day... lol

Blogger xoxKatexox says...,

Since you were sweet enough to leave a comment on my site, I thought that I would leave you one too.

Blogger SeizeTheNite says...,

I feel you on the hot part.

I've spent today either in the pool, naked, or complaining...
I long for snow...Huge piles of snow.

Who knew you and Le Sepent were such poets?

Blogger Larry Jones says...,

I like your couplet. It deserves to be set to music, don't you think?

Blogger Fromage de Merde says...,

It is hot all over: the ozone, the greenhouse effect, the political climate, my lack of inhibitions and let us not forget that, at least here in America, that we like it hot, pay good money for it to be hot. But not too hot! As then we’re too close to the abyss of overindulgence and then we got to start again or turn on the air conditioner and take a break before we indulge again!

Blogger W. S. Cross says...,

Reviewed your very witty site. Hope you like it!

Blogger Sarah Jo says...,

Nothing terribly intriuging to say, except that I cant spell terribly or intriuning. Just wanted to let you know that I stopped by and enjoyed your blog.

Blogger Alice: In Wonderland or Not says...,

"This day we share today is of a most peculiar kind:

Eternity in front of it, eternity behind."

I love that.

Blogger Jason says..., the poem, but whatever you do, do NOT flash your tits. In the name of everything which is eternal. Which is everything.

P.S. Hot here too.

Blogger GPV says...,

jason please mind your own business
trixie's free to flash anything she wants.

Blogger dimlightslittlecity says...,

As my dad would say, it's hotter than a three-peckered goat in mating season.

Blogger Indeterminacy says...,

I can visualize the horizon spanning all around you. I read it again, and visualize more.

Anonymous Anonymous says...,

cool bloggage thanks for sharing cum say hello sometime..shorter the skirt the higher the kick and the bigger the hoops the bigger the ho..LOL

Blogger Acidinmyfridge says...,

Hey Trixie ! Is there a human being there ? Miss you on the blog. Acid.

Blogger Indeterminacy says...,

Is there to be no more Patricia to cheer our days and steam our nights? I hope you come back to us!

Blogger Enemy of the Republic says...,

Hey, your site is awesome. I love it. Don't forget: the shorter the skirt, the higher the boot!

My girl!

Blogger ariel says...,

"This day we share today is of a most peculiar kind:
Eternity in front of it, eternity behind."

simply beautiful.

Blogger Tara Tainton says...,

Trixie! I've missed you. :) Hope you're doing well, having the usual fun, and have more to tell us very, very soon!



Anonymous Steel and Sapphire says...,

The archipelgo is amazing in summer. 3am twilight and a sun that never sets. Why wouldn't you get down in front of that, not matter how hot it is?

Anonymous Anonymous says...,

None of your blog is in Swedish?


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Guest Blogger: Danielle

Meet Danielle. She is exactly like me. Except totally opposite. And a better dancer.

I was introduced to her by a male friend of mine, who had started talking to her, and suggested that she and her equally pretty cousin should stage a 'catfight and bare-ass spanking' photo session. She rightly thought the idea was ridiculous, but comical, and they got acquainted.

I'm a tough chick that don't catfight, I fight boyz too. I don't scratch, I pull hair though. I have a lot of hair and it's long. It don't get pulled a lot. So I fought this girl, she was blonde I think. Ppl was sayin don't fight her U gonna kill her. This bitch bumped into me and called me a hoe and not say sorry, I grabbed her by the hair and f**ked her up. I killed that bitch.

The BET Awards is Black Entertainment Television that's what it stands for and the BET Awards R ppl who is nominated for who is the best female artist, best male artist, best actress, and performances. I was happy to be involved with something like that, I had a lot of fun.

That sounded funny. My mother is gonna kill me if she see BET Awards cuz what I was wearing.

Alright, I'm a choreographer. We had to be in an Army outfit, I was the only gurl on stage and a lot of boyz. I had to tease em a little, dats why we were dancin like that, and it felt good to dance wit somebody that is kool and I wasn't nervous at all. All the boyz jaws dropped when they saw me. They said I had a nice body.

The funny part about the performance is that when I came out, ppl were starin at me like wwwwooooooowwwwww!!!! Then they never stopped starin at me dancin, especially when I was poplockin, everybody liked that. Ppl say that I'm the best dancer they ever saw and I can't believe that.

When I left I had to go change and I was nervous to walk out cuz boyz were already starin at me sayin I have a nice ass when I was dancin. I was ignoring them so I had to run.

I had a lot of fun that day. I got more performances too, all over the world. I go on tour to Trenton NJ on the 20th so I'm good, but I still practice a lot.

Read on:

Danielle is 16 years old, and this is her first blog post. Every girl enjoys admiration, so don't hold back, but if I see any kind of untoward comment about any aspect of her (you all know the difference), I will naturally seek out the commenter and ram the comment back down the throat. Except for the commenters who actually would enjoy me doing that; I will send the Swedish Gimp, who I met last night, on them. But none of you would give me cause for that, now would you?

7 bounce-backs:

Anonymous Benton says...,

That's so cool! But stay in school! Or at least go back when you're 21, if you're not rich by then. And very few dancers are...

Anonymous Christopher says...,

If U and Ur cuzin won't catfight together, maybe you can blog together? Pictures, please!

Anonymous Boz says...,

hey Danielle,
you're a great writer in your own way.
the spelling helps, but you should get better smileys.
nice to meet you.

Blogger Canowine says...,

Where's the vid? It's great to read about, but I wish I could see the pop-lockin'.

Blogger gregoire says...,

yeah, that was good writing.

and you're so hot and I was about to add a few things to have stuff shoved down my throat by Trixie but then she'd send the Swedish Gimp and that sounds ever hotter...

Unfortunately I'm just too gay to think of anything dirty I'd like to do to you. Now you're co-dancers, that's a different story.

Screw school. Keep dancing. Oh and did I mention you're hot?

Blogger Alice: In Wonderland or Not says...,


Blogger Tara Tainton says...,

Nice to meet you, Danielle! Every gal oughta have a way of speaking her mind to the general public. Congrats on breaking your blogging virginity. ;)


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Game: Hex Bomb

When even a sweeet schoolmam (and a brilliant writer to boot) asks to see my tits, I realize that I have to comply. I just hope she doesn't bring me to 'Show and Tell'!

However, a nice girl is not supposed to do things like that for free. (It somehow prevents people from buying cows, although I never quite understood how.) So I asked a more professional girl I happened to meet what the proper charge for a simple flash would be. 'Oh, about a hundred dollars' she said, Then she paused, looked me over again, and said 'Or maybe fifty...' Something in her eyes made me decide to charge thirty-five dollars, and donate the money to a worthy cause, although I'm really against charity.

So to check my assets, you need to donate thirty-five bucks to XMLive. You can use your wealth and donate the money from your own pocket by clicking on the heart below 'About Me' in the right column (enter your e-mail address in the donor information, I'll send you an uncovered picture), or you can use your wits and win the money from me.

If you want to try winning the money from me, we'll play a game I used to play sitting or lying down on the rubber door mat in a school I went to. Player 1 (you) uses silver dollars, and player 2 (me) uses golden dollars. We take turns placing coins on the board (i.e. mat), and your objective is to create an unbroken chain of coins in adjacent 'cells' (hexagonal bumps in the mat) between the left and the right side of the board. Mine is to create an unbroken chain of coins between the upper and the lower side of the board. The first one to create the chain wins, and gets all the money on the board.

A winning game for you could look like this:

And a winning game for me could look like this:

You go first, and you need minimum seven coins to create a winning chain. To even out the odds since I play second, I only need minimum six coins, but in reality we'll usually both have to spend a bit more.

So I have covered my topless self with thirty-five golden dollars, which I'll use for the game. (If I win any silver dollars from you, I won't use them to cover myself - just to celebrate.) Win the golden dollars off me to see what I hide underneath! Remember though, it's a very mathematical game and I'm pretty good at it. So far, 21 people have stripped me completely online - but that's a number I expect to see auto-updated next time I check this post.

Play on:

18 bounce-backs:

Anonymous Christopher says...,

Woo-hoo, I beat you! Want to play double or nothing and really get to the bottom of this?

Anonymous Pitsky says...,

damn...that was my vacation fund...

Anonymous James Ashley says...,

Wow, what an awesome site. I'm hooked. And you're a very scary young lady.

Blogger Alice: In Wonderland or Not says...,

Shoot, and I sent all those photos to those guys who told me that good girls don't charge. :(

Blogger gregoire says...,

can you make one with your bro?


Blogger n.v. says...,

Trix, you're so sassy. I'll be reading this tomorrow. I'm so late to sleep. Day jobs suck my nards.


Blogger n.v. says...,

Le Serpent, are you le gay?

Blogger GPV says...,

trix,if you show me your tits I'll show you mine.

Blogger Trixie says...,

Christopher: Sure, but this time I won't provide your betting money. Up for it?

Pitsky: Well, what other relaxation than this could you need?

James: Thanks, especially for the 'scary' part! Good luck in revitalizing your own blog - mixing beer brewing, IP rights and SEO seems like a great start! (Especially if done simultaneously) Booh!

Alice: 'Good girls don't charge', I really like that. I'll embroider it on a tapestry and hang it next to 'Good girls don't cry' and 'Good girls don't tell'.

Serp: As I told you before, the best thing I can do for you in that department AFAIK is to wear a fake moustache. That's OK though, I've done way weirder things...

Nonvoc: Quit your day job, live by your looks. By the way, what ever could make you think le that of Le Serp?

GPV: I'll admit that in addition to Brains and Bling-Bling, Body is a valid currency too. So what do you have to offer? All I have seen is your house and your drawings. How about a self-portrait?

Blogger schuey says...,

tell me what you want and I trade it. :)

Blogger Sniffy says...,

Really fun posts, make an
"interesting " read.

Blogger Skarr says...,

Highly unusual blog and one of the better ones I've seen...

I did play and lost but I'm a sport and won't accuse you of anything!

I wish I could buy and display your mug in the office but I know it will probably get me fired !

Blogger dimlightslittlecity says...,

lol, good idea! :)

Blogger SeizeTheNite says...,

A lot of people would disagree with using the word "sweet" to describe me...

Now all I can imagine is men everywhere playing your game for hours until they win...
Though I'm willing to bet it will be worth the effort.

Anonymous humuhumu nukunuku apua‘a says...,

um... maybe i'm the first to notice, but isn't this one of the games where it's impossible to win? at least the way it's set up? This game has been my boredom reliever for the day.. and I haven't won yet.

Blogger Trixie says...,

Schuey: I thought I made it clear in my post what I want? Wits or wallet, my good fellow...

Sniffy: XOXOX If you continue to let older (I guess?) ladies like me twist you, you will certainly become a fine young man.

Skarr: Thanks, your blog is very interesting too - congratulations on the book deal! I don't mind accusations though, they make me feel so Jeanne d'Arc.

DimLights: You should do the same! Whatever you try to convince me and your other avid readers of, you're an obvious hottie. I mean, look at your picture for Chrissake...

SeizeTheNite: I'm sure a lot of people would disagree (the one you shot for instance), and I sincerely hope you didn't mind too much being used as a cheap laugh excuse like this (who would?) - but seriously, the way you describe the kids makes me wish that if I get my own troubled little brats one day they will at least have a teacher just like you.

Humuhumu...etc: I use a couple of different playing patterns, and let's just say some are very hard to win against. But of course, being beaten, humiliated, and (virtually) robbed a whole day has its charm too... Thanks for playing - hope you enjoyed it!

Anonymous Anonymous says...,

lol- you can't win.....she's only got 6 shapes to get through while we have 7

Anonymous Anonymous says...,

That's why we start - as soon as you placed your first dollar, both sides have "6 shapes to get through". Some of her playing algorithms are bloody impossible to beat, though...


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